Depression: One Woman's Story
By Marsha Jordan
Sharon was talking to a friend on the phone one night. When her friend
asked, "How are you?" Sharon suddenly exploded with emotion. Without
warning, she began sobbing and literally collapsed in a heap on the floor.
Her friend came over and took Sharon's kids for the night. Sharon cried for
hours till she fell asleep. It was only the first of many sleepless nights.
She cried every day for months, never knowing when she might break down.
She didn't need a reason. While driving to work in the morning, she would
burst into tears. She worried about embarrassing herself, so she stayed home
more and avoided people as much as she could.
Isolating herself made her feelings of loneliness worse. "Nobody
understands what I'm going through," she told herself. She felt that her
life was worthless because she could no longer function. She couldn't sleep,
eat, or focus on anything. She was irritable and couldn't seem to get along
with anyone anymore. She was disappointed and ashamed that she had let
herself sink so low. She tried her best to pull herself out of this "funk."
But she felt stuck. She felt guilty because her family deserved better
treatment than she was able to give them. She concluded that they would be
better off without her.
One day, while having an annual medical exam, Sharon's doctor asked how
things were at home. Sharon began crying uncontrollably. When her doctor
suggested that she was suffering from clinical depression, Sharon was
surprised. She should have known, but she didn't.
The doctor prescribed anti-depressants and made an appointment for Sharon
to talk with a therapist. Sharon didn't notice any improvement for a couple
of weeks. It started slowly, but she gradually began to feel more peaceful
and content. At this point, she was able to think more clearly and tackle
small steps, one at a time, to work toward taking charge of her mental
health. As Sharon took better care of herself, she grew stronger, which
helped her to continue on the path to wellness.
When she met with her doctor for a six week follow up, she told him, "I
just wish I had sought help earlier. I could have avoided so much pain."
Author Marsha Jordan is founder of a nonprofit charity called Hugs and
Hope for Sick Children (http://www.hugsandhope.org).
More of her articles on depression are in her book, Hugs, Hope, and Peanut
Butter, a compilation ofthought-provoking essays illustrated with drawings
by critically ill children. Proceeds from book sales will benefit kids
battling cancer and other life-threatening illnesses. In this book, the
author combines hope with humor, drawing upon her own experience of living
with chronic pain and depression for thirty years. She opens her life and
her heart to share everyday experiences and the lessons God has taught her
from them. Other essays in the book include, "Ten Tips For Beating
Depression," and "Why Doesn't God Answer My Prayer?" Order the book or learn
more at
http://www.hugsandhope.org/book.htm
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